Starbucks To Abandon WiFi, Will Toss Out Mobile Users

Starbucks announced late today that beginning tomorrow, April 1, they will no longer offer WiFi in their stores. According to a spokesman:

““We’ve discovered that there are too many customers coming in to take advantage of the wireless connectivity, who sit for hours on end and nurse only one cup of Joe. They rarely if ever make enough of a purchase to make this endeavor worthwhile from a bean counting perspective. Besides with the advent of various wireless cards and other solutions that allow customers 3G connectivity, very few were using our service anyway. Beginning on April 1 we’ll start, politely of course, asking customers using their mobile devices for longer than 15 minutes to please leave the store.”

After reading this news I contacted by buddy James Kendrick who is famous for his Coffee Break posts for a comment. According to jk:

““This breaks my heart. With the exception of a few unruly kids now and again, I had become very comfortable with using Starbucks as my mobile office. I’m not sure what my next step will be. Maybe I’ll start drinking tea.”

April Fools!